A passionate without passion

A passionate without passion

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How crazy is this? I spent all yesterday wishing that one of these daily prompts would be about passion. And here it is today. Thanks Daily Post.

You would wonder why  I wanted so bad to write about passion (or not,but I’ll tell you anyway)?! Well, lately I have been drowning myself with questions about what I want to do with my life. It’s a typical thing Scorpios like me do. This Q and A goes on forever in my mind and it is a spiral  of thoughts that will psychologically disconnect me from the world for the rest of the day.

Am I sure that this is what I want to do for the rest of my life?
Maybe I will be more successful if I try something new?
Will I be happy in this path I am taking?
Will this satisfy my ego?
Do I deserve more?
Is this worth it?

You see, the spiral is asphyxiating. But it is all about the God damn passion!
If you know a Scorpio, you definitely have seen how passionate they are about life, about their ideals, about emotions or feelings. Passion to us is way much more than lust or strong desires for something fleshy. Passion is the fire burning inside us. It’s what keeps us going. The drive, the energy, the striving, the ambition, the yearning…  It’s so intense. Call it whatever, to us it’s vital. Dare I say, life’s meaning for us is in the things we do with passion.

And here I am, a lover of passion wondering in which moment I lost it. Perhaps lost isn’t the right word. I didn’t loose it. The fact that I am still advancing and accomplishing whatever I set my eyes on means that my passion for hard work and success is still burning. And I am passionate about so many things in life: old dark mysteries, beautiful paintings, exploring not so popular cities, people’s psychology, intriguing books, jazz, soul and hip hop, thought-provoking conversations, alluring eyes and magnetic kisses. But something is missing…

I won’t rest until I find it. What am I REALLY passionate about?
On a last thought, maybe career paths are not about passion. Maybe passion exists just to give a specific essence to our lives so we all will have something special that makes us different from the others. I don’t know. Now I got myself into a wider spiral of questions and maybes (I feel like I am chasing my own tail) …